Prepare – He whakarite
Before I check in
- Choose a calm place with privacy.
- Check my own emotions and be ready to listen.
- Ensure we can connect them to support if needed.
My intention
Notice – He kitenga
Start by naming what you have seen or heard. Use "I" statements.
Example: "Kua kite au i a koe e noho mokemoke ana i ngā wā kai, ā, kua rongo hoki au i tō reo e pouri ana."
Name feelings – He whakamārama
Invite them to share how they are feeling without rushing to fix it.
Prompts: "Kei te pēhea tō ngākau i ēnei rā?", "He aha ngā mea e taumaha ana ki a koe?"
Offer support – He tautoko
Manaaki phrases
"Kāore koe e haere takitahi."
"He wā anō kei te pā mai ēnei kare ā-roto ki te katoa."
"Kei konei au, ā, ka haere tahi tāua ki te rapu āwhina."
My commitment
Connect to help – He hono
Plan how you will link them to trusted adults or services.
Trusted adult we can talk to
Service or helpline
1737 · Youthline · Lifeline · 111
Plan for follow-up
After the kōrero
- Check they feel safe before you leave.
- Let a trusted adult know if you are worried.
- Look after yourself – debrief with someone you trust.
Safety flag
If they talk about harming themselves or others, treat it as urgent:
- Stay with them.
- Tell an adult immediately.
- Call 111 if there is danger.